.Wednesday, October 22, 2008.
Superficial. Shallow. Lost.
That's what Cihui is like now.
Today was a super long day for me. I had 830 FA class in the morning and I was trying really really hard not to fall asleep. I wonder if the Prof was really boring today or was I really tired. I guess it was the latter since according to Sheryl, the Prof is equally boring every week. Prof Gan is starting FA classes at 8 am from next week onwards and I think I will forget about that and come to class at 830 as usual. After lessons, I had lunch with the usual gang at Kopitiam. It seems like Kopitiam is The PLACE for lunch after FA nowadays as it the favourite food court of Kendrick and Tai Xin. Sheryl was entertaining us during lunch as usual.
The few of us except Sheryl headed to the SR after lunch and I was practising for AS presentation while the other two were doing their work. Clarinda and myself managed to entertain ourselves by talking cock with the two. After the practice, Kendrick and I went over to school of business to meet the CT group for project discussion. That'sl life in SMU man. Projects after projects, meetings after meetings and non-stop walking from one building to another. We walked from SOE to the other end which is SOB for the meeting and walked back to SOE again for classes. Wow, SMU makes me healthy man. CT was all right, with presentation from all groups.
What really hit me hard on the head was Sheri'sgroup presentation. "So you think we are friends?" All that SMUgging shit, all that good lucks for your presentation, all that competitiveness and all that back stabbing. How sincere are each and everyone are in giving their blessings to each other and sincerely wish that the other party will do really well.Like what Prof Margaret Chan said, "wish others luck and you will have no luck"since it is such a competitive society. Sometimes I really feel lost about why I am working towards gaining extra marks or having better grades. Is it because that I trlu enjoy learning and want to do well for it or am I just striving to do what others are striving to do and competing with everyone else just because it seems like the fellow with the best grades would have the brightest future.Everyone is so busy with everything just because everything is graded. I am losing myself. I am lost in the world of being superficial, shallow and competitive. I detest the way I am now.
I think I need to lock myself up in a room sometime and sort out all my thoughts and find out who cihui really is. Perhaps I should start to look for a plot of land, grow my own crops and be a happy farmer.
Labels: Happy Farmer
